At the end of this week my son will be 1 month old. His picture is the featured image on this blog post. If you are getting this in an email you will have to click over to the website to see the picture. Crazy to think of how much time has slipped by since he was born. I am almost back into a normal work schedule and getting close to only having to get up once or twice during the night instead of sleeping on the couch.

I can think of about five defining moments in my life, outside of accepting Christ as Savior. God calling me into ministry, graduating college, getting married, becoming a dad and becoming a dad again. In each moment God revealed a brighter glimpse into His character, which made me understand better the work He had left to do on me. Recently, it dawned on me that I was having another one of those moments.

After MANY sleepless nights Val and I decided to take the bull by the horns and try to break JB from sleeping all day and crying all night. We were bound and determined to have him sleep in his own bed, in his own room. Being the educated parents we are and having already had one child we referred to our extensive child rearing library for the answer. About 9pm, after his final feeding for the evening, Dad and son entered into some quality male bonding time. The first 30 minutes were the easiest.

From about 9:30 to about 2am JB and I had a battle of wills. He wanted to be held and Dad wanted some sleep. According to our book we needed to place him in the bed and after he got upset pick up him, calm him down and then put him back in bed. The book said he would begin to get the picture after about 120 cycles. With nothing else to do to pass the time I counted, and after 160 cycles it was 2am and there was no end in sight. He would sleep for about 10 minutes after each feeding, but JB obviously didn’t read the book and wanted nothing of his crib.

In the middle of the night I got two clear pictures; one of God’s discipline and one of God’s love. In the picture of God’s discipline I understood myself to be a crying baby. My selfish desires against God’s desires for my life. God places us in specific circumstances for a reason and when we whine about our way versus His, we fail to see the task He has set before us. The longer we cry the longer we delay rest and fulfilling the purpose of where He has placed us.

The second picture I saw was God’s love. Despite our loud cries, God loves us unconditionally. After I picked up my son for the 161st time I decided just to hold him and fall asleep with him in my recliner. Though there is a lesson that needs to be learned, God also desires us to understand His grace. Grace is where God loves us and helps us to better understand we are safe in His arms. I also realized that the grace I had extended to JB that night needs to be extended to both my daughter and wife when my patience is running thin.

One thing I think we often forget is that though God may show us grace it doesn’t mean He is going to relent from His will. The next night we placed JB in his crib and he cried, but considerably less. The nights that have followed have become easier and I think it is because JB has come to understand our love and discipline in his life.